Being told I had breast cancer was a horrible, dark day and time, devastation I had never known before. Two days later being told I should have a single mastectomy was even darker.
You see I was defined by my breasts. Being naturally amply endowed, my place in life was "tall, blonde, with big..." They were perfect. Women were jealous of them, men coveted them. I had the best REAL breasts in Orange County. While admittedly they have headed south in the past few years, in the right bra I still had the best REAL breasts in Orange County. I was devastated at the thought of losing one. It didn’t matter to me that it was going to save my life. How I was going to look was more important to me than living longer (yep, I really did say that). Looking "horrible" was my all consuming fear. I wailed out loud for weeks. All I knew about a mastectomy were the devastating pictures and stories I’ve heard over the years... I was not going to look like that.
No one in my family has breast cancer. I knew no one personally that had had breast cancer. I just heard stories from friends over the years telling me how disfigured someone they know looked after their mastectomy. This was unchartered territory for me. I went through it all by myself and made the final decision to go through with a mastectomy with reconstruction myself. I was so scared.
But as soon as I saw myself the next morning when my breast surgeon “unwrapped me”, I was SO PLEASED that at that very moment it became my mission to spread the word: in the hands of the type of surgeons I was in, cosmetically, a woman can look great after a mastectomy.
The tears over how I was going to look cosmetically that I shed the weeks prior to my mastectomy were wasted. The cancer part of the experience is hideous, I can’t deny that. But my mission with this website is to educate women and men around the world, that based on my experience my tears over how I was going to look were a waste of time and energy. Having completed my second and final reconstructive surgery, I look AMAZING! I couldn’t be happier. My womanhood has been restored.
While admittedly I have days I miss my real bosom, I have moved forward and I can proudly say I have the best PAID FOR breasts in Orange County!
And yes I really do wear the tank top in the picture to the right. I designed it and wear it proudly. »
Newport Beach, CA